Has quarantine done a number on your social life? Yeah, me too. And at first I was really lonely. But as I spent more time with myself, my roommates, and our cats, I had a realization — maybe I have too many friends.
And I’m not saying I’m super popular or have a ton of friends or anything, because I don’t. But do you have those acquaintances you tend to just text when you’re bored? Maybe that one friend you go to with gossip? The friend you go out with, or the friends you go to brunch with every Sunday because it’s just become routine?
Now, none of those are inherently bad things. But quarantine has given us a lot of time to reflect on our friend groups. Distance does something — it allows us to see situations with clearer vision, instead of through rose-colored glasses. And it made me start to think…maybe I need to de-clutter my friends list. Not of all my friends or acquaintances, just the ones that don’t particularly add value to my life. So, without further ado: here are all the toxic friends you should gently let go of (while you still can)!
The Toxic Friends Who Only Call When They Need Something
You know this person. It’s an automatic thing — you see their name pop up on your phone and your immediate thought is, “Oh no, what now?”. Well I have news for you, lady — it is NOT YOUR JOB to fix all that friend’s problems or provide for all their needs. If your reflex reaction to a call or text from them is wondering what you’re about to be asked to do/give, I’ll tell you exactly what to give — give up the friendship.
The Toxic Friend Who Is Competitive For No Reason
And I’m not talking board game competitive or charades competitive. I am literally one of the most competitive people when it comes to games (thanks, Mom, I get it from you). I’m talking about that friend who just cannot celebrate your achievements because for whatever reason it makes them feel inferior. If you can’t share positive experiences without someone trying to one-up you, it’s probably time to lose that friend.
The Toxic Friends Who Always Steer The Conversations Back To Themselves
Ok, gonna put a little disclaimer right here: sometimes when you’re telling a friend about yourself and they start telling you about their own experiences, that’s their way of connecting with you and showing you that they understand what you’re feeling/thinking. That’s how I operate. Not trying to make it about me, just trying to show you I get it.
It becomes toxic when showing friends you understand really isn’t necessary. Say you get a promotion and you tell your friends, and that one friend immediately interjects with something similar that just happened to them. Or you’re telling a funny story and that person manages to make it all about them. Yeah, if that happens a lot and it gets annoying, just lose them.
The Toxic Ex You Still Text (Why? WHY?!?!)
Honestly, thank God for quarantine because it gave me the strength to FINALLY cut off my toxic ex. I blocked him literally everywhere. Do it, lady. It’s just ripping off a bandaid — stings a bit at first, but the pain goes away quickly and you can heal and breathe. Sounds amazing, right? If you still think you can’t do this one, I’m telling you — if I did it, you can absolutely do it. Do it now. Before you finish reading this article. Cut him off.
The Toxic Friend Who Complains About Literally Everything
Oof. Somebody probably popped into your head when you read that, right? Some friends are real Debbie Downers and just bring down the vibe whenever you’re around them. We all have our down moments or times we just need to complain about one thing or another, but doing it all the time is a bit toxic. Let them down easy and gradually, but definitely lose this friend.
The Toxic Friends Who Gossip To You About Everyone
Here’s a little secret: if they’re gossiping to you, they’re probably also gossiping about you. At the very least, you should stop confiding in these friends, because your stuff is not going to stay with them. Have you ever told someone something personal, and the next day everyone seems to know about it? Yeah. Ditch that friend.
The Toxic Friends Who Always Manage To Stir Up Trouble
These friends probably think of themselves as the “fun friend,” but it’s not fun when you’re running away from cops on horseback at the beach boardwalk (totally not a personal experience…).
You know that person you’re always a little nervous to go out with because you just know the night will probably end bad? Yeah, ditch that friend. Seriously. Lady, I have had too many of those toxic friendships to let you stay in one any longer. Lose the troublemaker, and you’ll be able to actually go out and have fun without worrying about where the night will lead. Sounds freeing, right?
The Toxic Friend Who Cancels Last Minute
Look, we all have stuff come up that gets in the way of plans sometimes. But you know that one friend who cancels plans literally every time you make them? Yeah, that’s a little toxic. Now, I’m not going to say you should always ditch this friend — there could be some underlying issues they need help with that get in the way of sticking to plans. But they also might just be flaky. And nobody likes a flake. You don’t even have to totally ditch the flaky friend, but you should probably stop making plans with them. Which will lead to spending less time with them. Which is actually basically getting rid of them, if you think about it.
Are there any other types of toxic friends we missed? Is it time for you to let go of them and be on the way to a better you? Let us know in the comments!
For More Life Advice, Check Out:
Here’s How To Actually Keep Your New Year’s Resolutions
Kick Off A Better Year By Detoxing From 2020’s Bad Vibes: Body, Mind, And Soul
