Welcome to the first episode of She’s a Full On Monet, a digital lifestyle magazine for women. Every week, our editor, Kelly Castillo, and contributor, Megan B, do a deep dive into articles and topics covered on the site. get outside
In today’s episode, we discuss seven tips to become a healthier version of yourself (read the article HERE). With the added stress and pressure of pandemic, many of us fell into some less-than-ideal habits. It is fine to get off track because life happens, but getting back in the saddle does not have to be overwhelming. In fact, we believe that it is better to start small, and by letting the changes compound, you will see big cumulative effects over time. Some of the tips we share in this show include drinking more water and how to trick yourself into being hydrated, the value of intentional deep sleep, how to ensure you are eating balanced meals, and the value of moving your body in whatever way you can. As women and mothers, we often tend to put our self-care on the backburner, but we have to change this way of thinking. When we show up for ourselves by meeting our needs, we can be better for everyone in our lives. We look forward to having you on this journey with us! get outside get outside
Key Points From This Episode:
Get to know Kelly and what She’s a Full On Monet is all about.
You can start out small when making the transition to a healthier life.
Megan’s personal experience in making lifestyle changes and how her life has shifted.
It is important to be gracious with yourself when you embark on a new journey.
Drink more water; add fruit if you need to make it taste better
Some of the benefits that come with drinking more water.
How Kelly weaned herself off of sugary drinks.
Be sure to get enough, good quality sleep. get outside
Establish a healthy sleep hygiene routine; put the phone away.
The benefits of tracking your sleep and what Kelly has noticed by tracking hers.
Avoid things that stimulate you before you go to bed.
FFPP eating: have fat, fiber, plants, and protein on all your plates to ensure balance.
You can still eat yummy treats when you go out or order in!
Move your body, and be creative when you can’t go to the gym.
The way you feel after you move your body is unmatched by anything else.
The importance of getting outside as often as you can.
Being in nature helps you be more present and in tune with your surroundings.
How you can help your kids release pent-up energy.
Learn to check in with yourself and self-soothe in healthy ways.
No matter how hard it is as a mom, you have to take time for yourself.
We should take care of ourselves as well as we take care of those in our lives.
The important question to ask yourself if you feel like you might be overindulging.
“I really think that everyone has something to say, and everyone has a valuable story to tell, and all of our perspectives are just as valid.” — Kelly Castillo [0:01:03]
“I really believe that it starts with the decision to change your life.” — Megan B [0:04:10]
“Once you make the intention to really prioritize your own self-care, it’s kind of a paradigm shift.” — Kelly Castillo [0:05:34]
“Movement of any sort is good for your body.” — Megan B [0:26:09]
“When I’m outside and doing something active outside, I’m more present that I am at any other time.” — Kelly Castillo [0:31:01]
“It’s literally healthy for you to take care of you.” — Megan B [0:40:49]
“It helps everyone when you’ve had some time for you.” — Megan B [0:41:46]
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
[00:00:01] ANNOUNCER: Welcome to She’s A Full On Monet, a digital lifestyle magazine for women. Every week, our Editor-In-Chief, Kelly Castillo, along with Megan Black and special guests, participate in a deep-dive discussion about recent articles and topics we have covered. We invite you to become part of our community, where everyone’s welcome.
[00:00:27] KC: Welcome to the first episode of the She’s A Full On Monet Podcast. I’m your Editor-In-Chief, Kelly. I just wanted to give us a little bit of an idea of what we’re going to be talking about and a little bit of background of who’s talking. I started Monet, gosh, I want to say, in July, it was a year. We’ve been about a year and a half. It’s coming up on the two-year mark pretty soon. It was started as a personal blog, and then it transitioned it into a lifestyle digital magazine for women.
I was never that comfortable with it being a personal blog. I don’t really like being the center of attention, although normally, I think I would. I really think that everyone has something to say, and everyone has a valuable story to tell. All of our perspectives are just as valid. I never thought my opinion should weigh above anyone else’s on anything. I really wanted to use it as a platform to open it up to all different voices.
In this podcast, we’re going to talk about two of the articles that we’ve published recently, and dive into them a little bit deeper than we get to do on the site, just because of space constraints and stuff. That’s what the format will be like. Yeah. I’m Kelly. I’m the editor-in-chief. I’m a mom of four. Although, I don’t have any birds in the nest at the moment. They’re all grown, flown the coop. I am an empty nester.
I thought my daughter left for school right when COVID was happening. I thought we were going to travel extensively that first year. The last little baby left home and I thought, “Oh, I don’t want an empty house. We’re going to travel.” Then of course, there was COVID. This has given me a great outlet to keep busy and to do something that’s just for myself and a creative outlet. I’m really committed to Monet. I think it’s a really good platform. Hopefully, everybody is as excited about it as I am. With me today, I have Megan.
[00:02:14] MB: Hi. Hi, I’m Megan. I am a contributor to Monet and I absolutely love it. I think it’s so cool that women have a place where they can share their voices about all different subjects. I love that we’re doing this, because sometimes that small paragraph, or sometimes a lengthy little article, you want to know a little bit more. This is a way to go more in further into some subjects that we sometimes feel a little bit deeper about and we want to talk a little bit more about. Yeah, I’m Megan. I am a mom of two. I still have my little ones here. They are nine and four and they are fantastic. I absolutely love them to death. This is super fun, because it gives me a complete creative outlet to share my love for certain things that we talk about, as well as doing the social media aspect of Monet as well. I’ve known Kelly for a really long time, and we just –
[00:03:06] KC: 15 years. Can you imagine?
[00:03:08] MB: That’s crazy. We’ve done all different sorts of avenues of things together. The one thing that falls back that I love so much is that I feel like I can talk to you all day long about literally anything. Your life itself in itself is just so fascinating that it’s just like, of course, of course this needs to happen. There’s a need to be a podcast where you and I can chat about things, like seven tips on how to live a healthy life; all kinds of wacky type of things. Because that is what is going on in our world right now.
Yeah, I’m very, very happy to be on board and very happy to be talking about these things. The first one we’re going to be talking about is seven tips to leading a healthier life. This is something that I really, really love the idea that we talked about it, because I heard about it and I’ve seen lots of TikToks about like, “Oh, how to live healthy?” Lots of eye-rolls happen. Then I finally applied it, and my life completely shifted. This happened during the pandemic.
I really believe it starts with a decision to change your life. If you’re waking up with this feeling of this funk, or you’re dragging yourself out of bed, or there’s something off and you just really want to change, starting simple with five or seven small things that will snowball into a bigger, bigger life change is a good way to start. It does start with that decision. I started it and then didn’t do it. Then it fell off. Then really started with an intention and did it intentionally for two straight weeks and a complete life shift happened.
That’s been my personal experience with this particular subject. It hasn’t been something I’ve been practicing forever, but it has something I’ve been doing consistently within the last three months and I’ve seen all around how I show up as a mother, how I show up as a person that works for other people, how I show up as a wife, all of that stuff, completely shifts in a good way, because of these small simple things that I do.
[00:05:11] KC: Yeah. I think especially as moms, we tend to put ourselves last so often. I mean, whether it’s eating for lunch, whatever the kids left on their plates, like half a chicken nugget and the crust of a peanut butter and jelly or something. We go without sleep for I don’t – I mean, I went without sleep for 20 years.
[00:05:30] MB: Can you believe it?
[00:05:33] KC: I think, once you make the intention to really prioritize your own self-care, it’s a paradigm shift. I know for me, during this Panda Express that we just went through, I would do these long, complicated 15-step skincare routines, because I had all that time. I was also snacking all day long and baking, which then, you’re not seeing anyone out, so it’s you eating all the stuff you had baked and binge-watching way too much TV.
For me, that was a wake-up call of okay, you’ve read all these other articles, where they tell you what you’re supposed to do like, oh, walk 10,000 steps a day and drink a glass of water. Unless you are doing it with some trick, at least for me, because I’m mentally stubborn. If I don’t do it almost like a competition with myself, like a little game that I’m playing to try to beat whatever challenge I’m giving myself that day, it doesn’t become a habit for me. I know I’m supposed to do it, but then it would be 9:00 at night and I’m being like, “Oh, I have not had any water and I didn’t do any steps and I didn’t even go outside. That’s fantastic. I’ll try again tomorrow.”
[00:06:43] MB: Right. Exactly. It’s also about being a little human about it. I know it’s hard, especially when you’ve done such a great job for a certain amount of days, then you fall off the wagon, because it was an off day. It’s hard not to beat yourself up about it. It is true. You can start again tomorrow. Your body feels the difference though, when you go a full day without water, or you literally have not seen the sun and you’re like, “Oh, shoot. That’s why I’m moody.” These are small, but very powerful things that you can apply everyday that can shift just how you show up to all things. How you show up to work, how you show up –
[00:07:22] KC: Yeah, and show up for yourself. How you show up for yourself. Yeah.
[00:07:25] MB: Important to show up for yourself the best way possible. Number one was drinking water. I’m the sucker who bought, because I had to. I feel like I had to. I’m the sucker who bought one of those that cheers you on as it goes like, almost there. I love that, because I feel like I don’t really know how much I’m getting done. I know how much I’m supposed to drink, but I don’t really know if what I’m filling up is the amount. I really love that. I got mine at Target. It was super simple. I also really, really love cutting up fruit and adding fruit to my water.
[00:07:59] KC: Me too.
[00:08:00] MB: I really hate the taste of water. No matter how much I drink, unless I’m working out and I’m chugging it like I have to. If I’m just drinking it for the sheer fact I need to hydrate, I really do not like the taste of water. I like to get fancy with it. I’d like strawberries and basil, and then just having it sit with the water over the entirety of the day just makes it taste slightly spiced like fun.
[00:08:29] KC: I only really like to drink water if it’s really cold. For me, those huge bottles with the time down the side, the ice melts and then melted ice to me is the most disgusting taste in the world. I don’t know why. I don’t know if my ice-maker smells like –
[00:08:42] MB: You know what? You’re right.
[00:08:43] KC: It is weird. It’s weird. It doesn’t taste like regular water. I use the smaller ones, like I have this one with me today. The tip I’d given in articles that I know how many ounces this one is. I know I should have at least two and probably three of these a day. When I refill it, I put one of my scrunchies, or hairbands.
[00:09:00] MB: I saw that.
[00:09:01] KC: Always on my wrist. Always, around the water bottle. By the end of the day, I don’t have to ask myself, “How many times did I fill this out?” I know right away.
[00:09:11] MB: That’s really smart.
[00:09:12] KC: That is my little tip that made me start to drink water.
[00:09:14] MB: I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone mentioned that before. I’ve heard getting the certain water bottles. I’ve heard fruit. Putting the scrunchie on was genius. Because then, you know.
[00:09:26] KC: The time to water bottles. I mean, if I fill it half-full of ice, how much water am I actually ingesting? I’ll dump it out and fill it again with ice and water and I’ll never really know how much I actually drink. Yeah.
[00:09:39] MB: Either way, anything is better than nothing. Because there was some – I’m going to be straight honest, there were some months that I went where I was using and supplementing other things for water. I would drink a lot of coffee and then I would be obviously thirsty, but I don’t like water, so I would just go for juicers. I was dehydrating myself for a while. Even just starting and your stomach isn’t going to know what’s going on, because it’s going to feel full and you’re going to go the bathroom a lot more, but it’s what it needs. Your skin is going to feel – it’s going to start to look a lot better. You’re just going to start to sleep better.
[00:10:16] KC: You digest your food better. Everything.
[00:10:18] MB: Yeah. You think you’re hungry, but really, you’re thirsty and you need to get some water in your system. I think, just starting anywhere is a good start. The tips that you had, especially with the scrunchie is a really good pointer, because –
[00:10:32] KC: Yeah. You know, I used to be a massive Diet Coke fanatic. From the minute I woke up in the morning, all day long Diet Coke. I knew. I mean, for years and years, I knew I had to break that habit. The only time in my life I was ever able to not have Diet Coke was when I was pregnant with my kids. Then, I mean, I immediately started again.
[00:10:51] MB: I remember. I remember. When we were doing the real estate, remember I would go to Bristol farms and then get a Diet Coke. Because then I liked it. I was like, “Oh, Cherry Coke.” How did you break the habit? Was it water?
[00:11:03] KC: No. I switched to Arnold Palmer’s, which I like the taste of. Then I just gradually cut – I mixed them at home myself. I just gradually cut down on the amount of lemonade, until it was just unsweetened iced tea, basically, sometimes with a slice of lemon in it or something. Then I just started watering that down, until I was basically having water. It took me, I want to say, probably six weeks or so to wean myself off of sugary sweet drinks to regular water, but I feel so much better.
[00:11:35] MB: Yeah. Wow. Now, it’s been a while, but I do remember that. I enjoyed it, because I got – Because I’ll have a Coke at 8:30 in the morning and that’s fine with me. I really liked it too. There’s a lot of people out there that that is a real habit. That they have a hard time kicking. My aunt was like that too, where there was just Coke all the time. It was just like, okay. I’ve always wondered how you kicked the habit, because it’s hard.
[00:12:06] KC: Yeah, it was a gradual process.
[00:12:08] MB: Yeah. Well, number two, getting enough sleep. I mean, if you’re caffeinated like crazy, you can’t. I love my caffeine. Getting enough sleep, intentional deep sleep. It’s not just closing your eyes, then eight hours later, opening it up. I’ve had nights asleep where I’ve had plenty of hours, but I don’t think I got to that deep enough sleep. The deep sleep is a big, big one. There is a routine you should be following prior to sleep. I have that habit of having the television on before I go to bed. It’s really hard to just transfer yourself from watching the screen like that to falling asleep and getting into that deep sleep cycle with the timeframe that you should, so that you wake up feeling refreshed.
[00:12:55] KC: Yeah. Or scrolling your phone. That’s such a bad habit right before bed. I’m terrible. I do it all the time. I’m so bad at it.
[00:13:01] MB: Yes. Also, waking up and doing it is the first thing that you do. I’m not going to sit here and say I don’t. When I don’t do that, when I wake up and I stretch and I make my bed and I get a glass of water with lemon or something, rather than grabbing the phone, it’s a much better day. The scrolling before bed is a really tough one habit to break, but switching to –
[00:13:25] KC: I know and they say, plug your phone in in another room or something. For me, my kids don’t live at home with me, so that’s not feasible. Because what if something happened in the middle of the night and I didn’t know it because my phone was in another room? I have that mom worry that I think is normal.
[00:13:41] MB: Of course. The one night you plug your phone away in the other room, that’s when something happens. That’s not a possibility for your life. Yeah.
[00:13:49] KC: I have it next to my bed, but I do my best not to scroll it, for at least 20 minutes before I go to bed. It does make a huge difference. I noticed for me, I have my Apple Watch, which I’m obsessed with. I started wearing it when I sleep and using an app called Pillow to track my sleep. I would enter in, like if I snacked before bed, or if I watched a movie right before, or things that I thought might be affecting my sleep, so I could look back at the month at a glance and see if there was a pattern, which helped me a lot.
Then, my hubby and I just bought a new mattress, a Tempur-Pedic. We hadn’t bought one, I don’t know, been eight years, 10 years I think, since we bought our last mattress. Now, the Tempur-Pedic has a sleep tracker built into it.
[00:14:34] MB: That’s crazy. When I read that in the article, I was like, “Wait. What? It does what now?” I just thought, “Wait.”
[00:14:41] KC: It even tells me how much REM sleep I’m getting, deep sleep, light sleep. Then it tracks the air quality in the room. I noticed that the air quality in the room was really bad. It was in the red zone every single night. I think, it’s because we tend to run the air conditioner in the night, or my husband uses a sleep pack with an oxygen generator. I think that was pumping out some CO2 or whatever into the hair. I cracked the window on the side of the bed and I leave that open at night. Now, I see the difference in the air quality according to my sleep tracker. It’s so crazy how detailed it is.
[00:15:18] MB: Yeah, that’s insane that it can do all that.
[00:15:20] KC: I know. It differentiates, because our bed is a split king bed. It’s two beds put together as a king bed, so he can elevate his side and it’s separate. It tracks my sleep totally separate from his sleep. Somehow, it doesn’t get us confused. I don’t understand the technology, but I’m very thankful that we have it.
[00:15:39] MB: Wow. That’s really cool. Do you feel like snacking before bed, is a detriment to getting good sleep? Because I like to snack before bed.
[00:15:48] KC: I think it depends. I think it depends on what I’m snacking on, because I’ve noticed like, if we go up in our theater room and we watch a movie, Alex and I both always grab candy, or something sweet to snack on while we’re watching a movie, because it feels like a movie theater and that’s what you want. You want popcorn or candy. We need to break that habit, because I noticed when we do that, neither one of us sleeps as good, having that sugar rush.
[00:16:11] MB: Okay. Because I eat sugar before bed all the time. I also don’t really have trouble sleeping. I don’t know if I get the deep sleep. I also fall right to sleep. My husband does not. He looks at me like it’s a superpower. I don’t know. I can fall asleep really easily.
[00:16:28] KC: Me too.
[00:16:29] MB: Yeah, right? I’m like, “I’m sorry. I don’t know how I do it.” Once I’m tired and in a sleep position, it just happens. He really has a hard time falling asleep. I’m just wondering how people like that get prepared, because it takes me little to no time, especially if I’m reading before bed, my eyes gets so tired. Reading before bed doesn’t – it helps me fall asleep, but if I’m really wanting to focus on the book that I’m reading, reading before bed is not a good time for me to read. It’s a good sleeping technique. It puts me to sleep. My dad likes the Calm app. Sometimes it helps.
[00:17:06] KC: Yeah. Alex uses that too.
[00:17:07] MB: Yeah. That’s a really nice one. I get that. That could help.
[00:17:11] KC: My girls, neither one of them has ever been a good sleeper. They have trouble shutting off their brain to fall asleep. They’ll lay down and they’ll – in order to sleep, you have to pretend to sleep. That’s the weirdest thing. They’ll lay down and then their mind is just racing with all the things they need to do, things they should get up and write down. They just can’t go to sleep. It’s always been that way.
Samantha, she started taking the – there’s a brand called Sugar Bear Hair. I’m sure you’re familiar with those candies. They make it a sleep one, Sugar Bear Sleep. It tastes like gummy bears, but it’s not just melatonin. I think it has valerian root and chamomile and lemon balm. It knocks her right out.
[00:17:52] MB: Oh, I’m trying this. Because my girls, they both have colored pencils and sketchbook and they both have to color before bed. I’ve given up on the idea of shutting the light off. This is post-bedtime story. They’re still like, “Okay, goodnight. Hi.” I don’t even pretend. We don’t even do the whole thing where like, shut your eyes, because who are we kidding? They’re going to just do – They like to color before bed. I feel like, especially my oldest, if I match the gummy bear with that, that the coloring time would decrease a little bit. I just fall asleep sooner, because they’re kids and they need more sleep than they think.
[00:18:33] KC: Yeah. I would look into the Sugar Bear Hair has that, that sleep one. Because it’s just natural stuff and it really, I know it’s helped my girls a ton to fall asleep. Valerian root is really good for stress and anxiety and quiets your mind, which can help you fall asleep faster. I mean, valerian root, you can buy the valerian root teas and stuff. It helps you first with the taste, or more.
[00:18:56] MB: Yeah, gummy bear is going to go down with my kids a lot. I mean, their vitamins are gummy bears. This already fits the lifestyle.
[00:19:04] KC: Yeah. Exactly. The next one is what I call FFPP eating, which years ago, I read a book by Kelly Leveque, Kelly Leveque. I hope I’m saying that right, because she’s great. It was a book about loving your body and doing what’s best for your body and making sure that every plate at every meal is balanced. She goes way more into it. If you’re into this, definitely look up her Instagram, or her book. The one I’m talking about is called Body Love. It’s not a diet, because she doesn’t really believe in diet culture. Neither do.
It’s about just a new way of eating for the rest of your life. While I thought it was amazing, it was really – it would be hard for me to follow super closely what she was saying for every meal, because, I mean, I do like my French fries. I do like my recipes.
[00:19:53] MB: I know. I was looking over and I’m like, “Is this all the time?”
[00:19:59] KC: I also really believe that over my whole entire day, I do you need balance. If I have a really busy day and I’m just literally grabbing what’s in front of me and shoving it in my mouth, because I’m on the run, I’m eating in the car. I’m like, “Okay, it’s a bagel for breakfast.” Then we’re in the car, we’re going, going, going. It’s whenever we can get fast for lunch.
[00:20:18] MB: Or I’m a Starbucks breakfast – I will convince myself that banana nut bread for eight hours was breakfast.
[00:20:27] KC: It’s says banana — right there in the title!
[00:20:27] MB: Probably lunch.
[00:20:31] KC: I try to have balance of keeping in mind at least, I’m by no means am I good at this, or perfect at this. At least, I have it in my mind. It’s a little hack, where I call it FFPP, which every plate or every meal, ideally in a perfect world, would have fat in it. It could be avocado, it could be olive oil, it could be cheese, it could be anything that are healthier fats, and then fiber. If I’m keeping this in mind, that’s when I reach for a whole grain if I’m making a sandwich, or something with bread. I reach for a whole grain option, knowing that I need the fiber, or I’ll do some grain as a side dish, that brown rice, or barley, or something that is better than a white rice. Then the P and the P are plants and protein. It could be, if it’s breakfast for me, plants is usually fruit. I don’t eat a lot of vegetables for breakfast.
[00:21:22] MB: Yeah, no.
[00:21:24] KC: Protein can be combined with the fat. If it’s Greek yogurt, if it’s cheese or something like that, you’re getting a two for one. I keep that in mind, whether I’m – if I’m making even a smoothie, I try to make sure it has all four things it. Fiber, honestly, can be hard up with some chia seeds in there, or something, or some flax. I tried to create that balance. Anytime I’m preparing a meal for myself and I have the time in the kitchen to prepare a meal, I follow that.
If I’m out, I’m not super strict about it. If I’m out and everyone’s getting nachos, I’m like, “Hey, nachos. That’s fine.” It sounds delicious. If I’m making my own meal, then that’s what I’m going for.
[00:22:03] MB: Same. Yeah. No, I’m the same way. I mean, this all comes from my husband. He’s a trainer and a nutritionist. That’s just something we’ve always brand by. It’s also hard for my girls to ever eat. Emma just recently started liking Caesar salad, but let’s be honest, that’s not. That’s the party salad. We do shakes almost every single night. When I make a shake, there are certain things I follow. It’s the exact same way. I always put some fat and there always has to be some avocado. Or, like you said, olive oil is a great way, but avocado tastes way better in the shakes. Then some seed to fiber it up, then lots of plants go in that. Then some protein. We like to add Greek yogurt, or something to the shake if there isn’t a protein present in the meal.
The protein and the fiber, my girls really love rice and quinoa and stuff like that. Protein isn’t really a problem. We like to eat chicken and all that stuff. The shake fills in the blanks that were missing, because we also like to live by that. If we’re going out for pizza, there’s no way. We’re not going to pack a shake with me and be like, “Here guys. Let’s do this.” We pizza party. That’s the rule we jump up most days, like most days, we live by that rule. There’s maybe one day a week, if I’m Doordashing or something. Even then, I’ll still throw in a shake. If I Doordash something yummy and I’m eating it at home, I still make that shake, and that shake still has all of those FFPP guidelines that you would think.
[00:23:40] KC: Yeah. It’s not as hard. I mean, it’s not really that hard to do. I mean, I switched out from buying non-fat Greek yogurt. I always buy the plain yogurt to full fat, because I know that if I’m making a little granola and fruit bowl for me in the morning, or a shake with it or something, then I don’t have to worry about adding the fat component, because it’s already there. Just little things like that, just were a game changer. I’m trying to drag Alex along on this journey with me. It’s just not his journey.
[00:24:11] MB: Does he do the smoothies or anything? Smoothies are coming easy to intake.
[00:24:16] KC: Yeah. I think if I’m making one, usually – he’ll usually drink about half of it, and then I’ll find it somewhere around the house later, like a day later. It’s so gross.
[00:24:24] MB: Whatever. Halfway.
[00:24:26] KC: Half is best than nothing.
[00:24:27] MB: Half-full.
[00:24:30] KC: I mean, his style of eating, he would go an entire day and not have a single plant. He’d have a muffin for breakfast, or eggs and then a burger and fries at lunch, or chicken and rice or something.
[00:24:41] MB: Bless you.
[00:24:43] KC: Yeah, and not a single plant in sight. I’m like, “How are you still alive?” Honestly.
[00:24:49] MB: Dan is a trainer and a nutritionist. He openly says out loud, “You don’t win friends with salad.” He hates plants. He hates them. He will make a shake before he eats a salad. If you try and put a salad in front of him and you’re like, “Wait, you do what for a living?” It’s crazy. The thought of eating all those vegetables is just not his thing, when in my reality, I love a good salad.
You can make a really good tasting salad. I just feel like, those people just haven’t had a good salad in their life and maybe they just don’t know, or they just – A smoothie is a really easy way to get that in.
[00:25:27] KC: I agree.
[00:25:27] MB: It’s cool, because even places that are Jamba Juice, and you can find really good – Whole Foods makes really good smoothies. You don’t have to make it yourself. You can get it anywhere, but still make sure those thoughts are in mind. Yeah. Move your body. Move your body, number four. That’s a big one. That’s such an important one. I didn’t move my body for – especially in this pandemic. Oh, man. With everything being shut down. If you don’t have a home gym to be able to go and you’re used to seeing a trainer, or used to going to a gym and having a routine, or say, you wanted to start wondering the pandemic, but you’re like, “What do I do?”
Man. Moving any movement of any sort is good for your body. It doesn’t have to be crazy weightlifting, but any movement. YouTube’s free and there’s so many videos that you can just put on and just move and get happy with it. There’s so many fun ways to move from home, where you don’t need a gym. Yeah, moving your body is great.
[00:26:29] KC: There’s so many apps that are free. There are so many videos on Amazon Prime, on YouTube that –
[00:26:35] MB: Instagram. People, you can buy programs. People have it programs on Instagram that you can do. They’re always posting videos there. There’s so many ways. The thing is, you got to find your thing.
[00:26:47] KC: That’s the thing. I hate exercise. I hate it. Going to a gym and just getting on a machine and repetitive exercise, I’m literally counting the minutes till I can get off and I’m thinking of all the other things I could be doing with my time.
[00:26:58] MB: Oh, man.
[00:26:59] KC: When I find something that I like, then I’m much more – Then it doesn’t seem work, like a chore to me. You just have to find whatever it is that makes you feel good while you’re doing it and not like, “When can I be done?”
[00:27:16] MB: Well, the crazy thing about it is I’m personally right now, doing a complete and total fitness journey. I’m not a gym person, but I’ve been going to the gym six days a week for the last two weeks, three weeks. The reason is not for vanity reasons. It’s because it bleeds into all of the other things that we’re talking about. I noticed that I was not eating at all. When I was eating, it was poor, poor decision foods, foods that were just making me feel good, but weren’t giving my body any nourishment.
Then, I was showing up as a mom and a wife, as this angry, hormonally, unbalanced person. I just decided that if I had a goal that was just crazy, that I had never done before, because I’ve been an athlete, but I never had a big fitness goal, that it would just bleed in all those other categories. Fitness has been a new thing for me. Moving my body has been a new thing. Ever since the gym has opened a little bit more, I’ve been showing up to the gym, and oh, my goodness, the difference in me as a person. I know, people say like, “Oh, going to the gym is therapy.” No, for real. Once you move your body and move your body long enough to where you just release all these – I know there’s a science behind it. You just feel so much better when you’re done.
I also noticed that if I do it in the beginning of the day, it is way easier, because I’ll make excuses to not do it if I wait until the end of the day. If I do it in the beginning of the day, all of my food decisions follow that, too.
[00:28:45] KC: Right. Motivates you to keep all the healthy decisions going for the rest of the day.
[00:28:48] MB: Exactly. You get hungry after working out, so you eat a healthy – or you eat. You eat a breakfast. I noticed that during especially during the pandemic, I was not moving at all. I wasn’t getting hungry, and so I wasn’t eating. Then, I wasn’t eating well, and so I wasn’t sleeping. It’s just a snowball effect of that.
[00:29:06] KC: It’s altogether. I know, this ties into the next one, too. I know for me, what feels the least like a chore exercise-wise is anything I’m doing outside. That’s our next one is get outside. I love to be outside. Thankfully, we live here in Southern California, where we can do that all year long. For me, when I’m out, if I’m hiking, if I’m walking the dogs, if I’m going for a bike ride, if I’m doing any outdoor activities on the water, anything like that. If I’m outside, it doesn’t feel like it’s exercise and I need to do this for 45 minutes, and how many reps, how many minutes, how many steps.
I track it on my Apple Watch. I tell my Apple Watch what I’m doing, so it can monitor my heart rate and stuff. I’m not thinking of it so much as a checklist item on my day. It’s more restorative for me to be outside, unless I’m doing something that’s moving my body. For me, I prefer to do most of my exercise outside.
[00:30:02] MB: You have some fun stuff to play with. You have some beautiful trails and the horses are nice. Just being able to be in a place where that is available is yeah, utilize that.
[00:30:13] KC: That’s a huge privilege. I mean, I can take my dogs right out the front door and onto 40 miles of hiking trails in my neighborhood. All I have to worry about is rattlesnakes. My dog is humongously scary and big, so nobody’s worrying about nobody. No black cats are bothering me, or mooshy walking gigantic dog.
[00:30:33] MB: Yeah. Your body is huge. There’s a big science behind just how what it releases. Then, I just noticed that little small things don’t bother me. I don’t get easily irritable. I drink more water, because I’ve been exercising. It’s just a cool snowball effect. Getting outside, not only is it cool to do some really cool things outside, but just being in the sunlight, that vitamin D is a natural mood lifter in itself.
[00:30:59] KC: I think for me, when I’m outside and doing something active outside, I’m more present than I am at any other time. If I was in a gym with earbuds in doing my workout, I would be in my head. When I’m outside, I’m listening to the wind in the trees, I’m listening to birds, I’m looking around me. I’m saying hi to neighbors. I’m seeing what’s going on in the outdoors. I’m much more present in my body in those moments and present in the world in those moments, than I am if I’m on my Peloton just staring at a screen.
[00:31:28] MB: Also, from someone who goes to the gym a lot and I know you can relate to this as a woman, going to the gym can also be a place where you’re also very aware of how other people are looking at you. You’re very just aware of your surroundings in not a positive way. When you’re outside, you’re very aware of your surroundings in a very positive way. I prefer to be on a hiking trail than on a Stairmaster, worrying if the guy next to me is being creepy.
I much prefer that. Sometimes, if it’s 80 degrees. My husband is a fitness director at the gym, so he also works 12-hour days. Sometimes I’m going to be real, that’s the time I get to save my husband too. I would very much, I also live in a place and I live in 1000 Oaks area and there’s so many hiking trails up here that it’s almost silly that I ever show up to a gym, because why wouldn’t you utilize that? I do.
When you can hear the birds and you can look at the flowers and you can just see a random squirrel run by, you’re also listening for rattlesnakes, it’s a different take on cardio, than in a Peloton and watching the scene of something you can go do. Yeah, it just depends on what your thing is. Some people don’t like to do that at all, but they’d rather play a sport, or do yoga, or whatever.
[00:32:50] KC: I mean, have a crazy dance party in your kitchen and dance out. Whatever makes you happy.
[00:32:54] MB: Oh, man. We have the Nintendo Switch. I have the dance thing. I do that with my kids, and I’m trying to keep up with that. That’s cardio. I mean, what I do for cardio with my girls, and exercise with my girls, because when everything shut down, man, everything shut down. Yeah, gyms shut down, but playground shut down. You couldn’t go on hiking trails without people – Trying to get my girls get their energy out and get their cardio out and keep them healthy and keep them active during that time. Still, now during this time is really hard.
We love an app called GoNoodle. It’s something that plays through our Apple TV, but it’s an app you can do. It’s just 10 to 15-minutes different. There’s yoga, there’s hip-hop dances, and it’s for kids, and it’s all kid related.
[00:33:45] KC: Oh, that’s so fun.
[00:33:46] MB: Kids are also having a really hard time with this thing of getting outside and also exercise, especially during this time, because everything is blocked off. Nothing, you can’t do anything. You have these crazy kid inside stuck, because they need to get it out and they don’t know where to go.
Now we’re in a place where things are opening back up and you can go play on the playgrounds a bit more. For a while, that was tough. Trying to get them outside safely and also exercise safely was not fun.
[00:34:14] KC: You can imagine.
[00:34:17] MB: Yeah. Anyway, self-soothing is big.
[00:34:21] KC: Big. Okay, I’ll talk about this one. When my son was little, Colin, he sucked his thumb. He also had a Binky, not a pacifier, like a blankie. My ex-husband, his dad would always try every little thing to get him to stop sucking his thumb. Bribery. He had this yucky-tasting nail polish he would put on Colin’s thumbnail. If you saw him sucking his thumbnail, pull it out of his mouth and say, “Don’t do that.” I would always tell him, “How many kids do you see in college with their thumb in their mouth? No.”
[00:34:54] MB: Right. It’ll work itself out.
[00:34:55] KC: It’ll work itself out. I’ve never met a non-potty-trained adult. I don’t stress –
[00:35:00] MB: I tell myself that as I’m potty training now. If I fail, life will find a way.
[00:35:05] KC: Yeah. I mean, there could be such a thing, but I’ve never seen a middle schooler having his diaper changed in the parking lot. You just have to let them figure it out. For him, it made me my life easier as a parent that he was able to self-soothe, because he could put himself back to sleep when he woke up. He could calm himself down with those tools that he had in his toolbox.
I think for myself, I’m an adult, like my family, I don’t have a blankie, but I do things, specifically when I check in with myself and I say, “Okay, today’s been a stressful day. What can you do to decompress from this day that’s not unhealthy?” Because I know, I self-soothe with treat foods. I definitely do that. I try to find other ways. If it’s a hot bubble bath, if it’s taking some time to watch a murder show, or whatever your favorite TV that really gets you out of your head is. That’s not maybe the healthiest, but it’s better than eating a whole sleeve of Oreos. You do you. Whatever you got to do.
[00:36:11] MB: There’s a time, at least, for that too.
[00:36:13] KC: Sometimes, I just need to go and I just sit on the deck by myself, put my air pods in, scroll through some mindless TikTok or something, have a glass of wine and just decompress from my day. I think, that’s probably different for everybody, whatever works for you, as long as it’s not creating an unhealthy habit. As much as I did just say, that I’ll sit out there with a glass of wine, I think the mommy wine culture, it’s a pet peeve of mine for sure. I have no problem with having a glass of wine in the evening. I think, we’ve glorified it as this coping mechanism for motherhood and a soothing mechanism.
I think if you’re having wine every evening to escape, that’s probably unhealthy. That’s something you probably need to explore. We’ve made it into memes and little plastic thing on the wall –
[00:37:01] MB: TikToks.
[00:37:02] KC: – and t-shirts and custom wine glasses that say, my kids are why I drink. I think, some people may have an issue and they don’t even know they have an issue, because all of society has glorified —
[00:37:15] MB: No, I agree.
[00:37:16] KC: A glass of wine in the evening is awesome, but it shouldn’t be the crutch that gets you through the day. For me, usually it’s a bubble bath at the end of the day. No one is allowed in that room with me to interrupt me. Hot bubble bath, maybe a good book, or put my air pods in and chill out, and take back a little time for myself, which is not easy to do when you’re a mom. It’s easy to feel guilty about taking time for yourself, but I think it’s important. You have to recharge your batteries. You have to. Or you’re going to run out of steam and it’s not good for your family either at that point.
[00:37:51] MB: Yeah, I agree. It’s true. You keep putting it on the back burner and the back burner. You can roll your eyes when you hear somebody say, “Oh, but you’re not showing up at your best.” Really though, if you really want to show up as the best employee and the best mother and just the best possible you, screw everybody else. You do need to take and carve out that time. No matter how painful it’s going to feel at first, because you’re going to feel guilty about it – I’m a mom of a nine-year-old and a four-year-old. Honestly, I feel like, anytime I take for myself, I feel guilty. I’ve been feeling less guilty about it, because I know that I deserve to be whole, just as myself. If I don’t take that time, or if I wait until the end of the day, it’s just not going to happen. You know what I mean?
Sometimes it’s all we have. For me, my girls just recently started going back to school, but for a while, it was just the three of us all day long. For me, me time comes after bedtime. Now, I have been more vocal about asking for help. I have a fortunate situation right now where I am currently living with my in-laws, so that we can save up for our forever place. Going to the gym, or going to Target and just literally not hitting up just the kid sections. Just going to Target for the sheer fact that I just need to go to Target for 20 minutes to escape a little bit. Asking for help really helps, because sometimes I just think it’s just me versus the world. If I just asked for 20 or 30 minutes of extra help, I don’t have to wait till the end of the day to give myself some me time. Because yeah, I understand that have to be an adult about when I carve that time in. Sometimes, waiting until the end of the day, it means it’s not going to happen sometimes, unfortunately.
[00:39:38] KC: Or you’re so exhausted, you’re not getting any benefit from it.
[00:39:43] MB: Right. My husband, he comes home right before they go to bed. The time that I now spend with my husband starts when they go to bed. When’s my me time? I have to make intentional time now to carve that out. Ever since I’ve been doing that, it was like, “You know what? I’m just going to grab a Starbucks and go to Target and see what new dresses they came out with, because I haven’t been in six months.” Take that time and not really need anything for the kids, but go for me. That’s my thing.
I like to watch Bridgerton. I like to find a good show and just decompress. If that means I’ve seen it, I’m not a person that will watch the same show over and over. I’ve seen New Girl a billion times. Watching certain shows help me decompress. Listening to Taylor Swift for a while outside and just listening to the lyrics and feeling it. That’s how I love music. I love a good show and I love a Target run for no reason sometimes. That’s how I decompress.
Telling yourself whatever that form of it is, telling yourself that that’s what you need in order to be a whole person and that it’s healthy, it’s really – it’s literally healthy for you to take care of you. People forget that.
[00:40:53] KC: That’s what we need to remind ourselves of, that –
[00:40:55] MB: It’s weird. It’s weird how we forget that.
[00:40:58] KC: We have the same value as anyone else in our lives that we’re taking care of. We should take good care of ourselves, at least as well as we take care of our husbands, our partners, our kids, the people in our lives that we care about. We should offer ourselves that same grace, and it’s not easy. It takes practice.
At the end of the day, it usually happens to me late afternoon. If I’ve had a really busy day and I’ve had no time, that’s when I start – I’ll snap at my husband, or I will feel super overwhelmed about the prospect of even figuring out what’s for dinner. I need to take a few minutes and go outside, lay in the sun, just relax, do something where I can decompress, because it’s to everyone’s benefit.
[00:41:43] MB: I agree. Yeah, no. It helps everyone when you’ve had some time for you. Especially during this weird time that we’ve had, where everyone’s been stuck with each other, you just got to like, “I need to go in this corner now.” I’ll see you in 20. Then we’ll reconvene. Because if you wait too long, it’s like a boiling pot and it will just boil over. Yeah, self-soothing, just getting exercise, find that whatever that is and just make sure you put it in your routine as long as it’s not – I don’t want to say that eating a sleeve of Oreos is bad. Sometimes you need that. If it’s a consistent everyday of like, “Oh, I’ve had a bad day. I need a sleeve of Oreos.” That was me too. I like sweets and I like to snack and I like to feel – food tastes good.
I’m on some weight loss thing, but you want to be healthy and you want to make – you don’t want to make excuses of like, “Oh, I need to self soothe, because I’ve had a bad day. I’m going to go do this thing.” Then it snowballs into, “Oh, I ate unhealthy,” and then your hormones are all over the place. Then you start to snap and you’re like, “Where did I go wrong here? I thought I was doing something for me.” Every now and then it’s fine. Make sure whatever that self-soothing thing is also in-line with the person you’re trying to show up to be.
[00:42:59] KC: Yeah, and your goals for yourself. Whatever you’re reaching for to decompress is something that isn’t in your best interest for your body and for yourself, whether it’s too much alcohol, too much sweets, a pharmaceutical crash, whatever it is. You just have to ask yourself, “Is this really a benefit to me? Is this really serving me and who I want to be?” Because it is really easy to rely on things that aren’t healthy for us, as self-soothing. If we can find healthy alternatives, and it could be splurging and going getting yourself a massage. It could be something like that. You just have to find what works for you.
[00:43:40] ANNOUNCER: Thanks so much for listening to this week’s episode. Don’t forget to bookmark our site, shesafullonmonet.com. Subscribe to our newsletter. You can also find us on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube. If you’re enjoying this podcast, it helps us a lot if you can follow, rate and review. See you all next week.